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Hi,

as you may know by now, I’m a self healer who has healed herself from a childhood trauma.

If you’ve been unaware of that but want to know more, please head over to my blog. It's all there.

Thank you 🙏🏻

 

At one point during my healing journey I began to write down thoughts about healing and other things that popped into my mind. I call them “spilled thoughts”. They helped and still help me to quiet my mind and to let go of things I need to let go of.

 

After I had written quite a few of these spilled thoughts, I felt the need to turn them and my experiences into a book of some sort to support others on their healing journey.

 

So, when at another point during my healing journey I rediscovered my love for painting and my spilled thoughts started to inspire me to paint pictures for them this book idea of mine changed from merely writing about my experiences and adding my spilled thoughts to creating a picture book with my spilled thoughts only; a picture book that would show both truths of healing: the ugly and the wonderful one, because - let's face it - healings hurts. Actually, I'd intended "Healing Hurts" to be the title of this book, but as change is a universal constant the title became "Healing ...what was will no longer be..." after a very intense healing session. 

 

And now that I have my own website my book idea changed from putting a real book together to publishing it here page by page and in no particular order, because healing has no order it just happens...

I hope my words and pictures will help, encourage and maybe even guide you a little during your healing journey.

Love,

Sabine ❤️

Btw: A click on any picture will enlarge it. In case this doesn't work, please deactivate your pop-up blocker. 

If you've read "My Story" in my blog you know that my little wise daughter got me started on my healing journey with her advice: “Try meditating, Mum. It will help you.”

So, it will probably come as no surprise to you that I dedicate my "book" to her. 

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For Savannah, 

my little wise daughter. 

 

Without you this healing journey would have never been possible.

 

I will be forever grateful to you.

 

Love,

Mom ❤️

This is me now

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I am an amazing person.

 

I haven’t always felt this way about myself because of a complex childhood trauma.

 

Of course, I only know that now… having done some serious uncovering, unravelling, unbecoming and unlearning. It’s taken me a long time, but I’ve healed myself from this. It wasn’t easy. It hurt a lot. But I did it! And so can you!

It was quite a journey and I will share glimpses of it with you; glimpses that will hopefully help and encourage you during your own healing; glimpses that will tell you about the ugly and the wonderful truth about healing so that

one day you will be able to say: 

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So, this is where I invite you to do the work, to heal yourself from whatever it is you need to heal from.

🔊 Sound on and you'll hear me talking to you.

Music: Keith Kenniff “Falls” provided by iMovie for iPadOS

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In other words: You got this!

Just keep in mind that everybody’s healing is individual and unique. There’s neither a mandatory procedure nor a step-by-step-manual to follow. Each person needs something different to heal them. 

 

The only thing in common for everybody is that healing always comes from within. Only if and when YOU are ready and willing to heal, will you heal to the extent you are ready and willing to heal. For every healing only goes as far as we allow it to go.

 

Of course, healing yourself does not mean renouncing medical help or therapy. Absolutely not! You are allowed to get all the help you FEEL you need. 

 

To find out what helps you, you need to turn inwards, ask yourself and listen to the answer.

 

For me the answer had been some therapy, no meds at all, a lot of meditation and various methods of energy healing which ultimately led to spiritual growth. 

Let’s start with an ugly truth… not to discourage you, but to prepare you… 

 

...and because this was the first of many spilled thoughts I wrote down during my healing journey.

 

Realising this had hit me so hard I just had to write it down. And with that writing became one of many “tools” I used to heal myself, albeit a very, very important one.

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Another early impression I had about what healing is like is this: 

healing is like walking through dense fog...

...you don’t see where you’re going...

...you’re inching forward... 

...you’re stumbling...

...you’re falling...

...you’re getting up again...

...you’re hitting walls...

...you’re walking in circles without being aware of it...

...you’re taking detours without knowing it...

...you’re getting scared...

...you’re getting desperate...

...you’re getting tired of it…

!!! but you keep going !!!

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So…

… no matter how weird, painful, illogical, off course, and hard it is.

… no matter how many reruns, loops and backtracking you have to do

… trust the process

… always…

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In other words:

Baby steps, are still steps,

little progress is still progress 

and even no progress is progress,

because of what you’ve accomplished so far.

Be proud of yourself!

Be grateful to yourself!

This list is by no means complete...

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The healing path...

I didn’t plan the route

I simply started to walk on the path

step after step after step

letting the path reveal itself to me

step after step after step

hoping that I would find healing… 

Breaking through...

...the moment...

...you feel another piece of the puzzle falling into place

   and make a huge step forward...

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Just like this tree

withstands the storms and waves of nature

YOU

will weather the storms and waves of healing.

So, always keep in mind: You are much stronger than you think you are.

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While you're healing, you will realize and learn a lot about yourself and your past...

In other words...

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No matter how bad you might feel and how dark it may get, you have a light inside yourself that is always there to guide you.

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Letting go is a vital part of healing!

You'll have to do this over and over and over again but it's so worth it.

For your mind healing is not logical at all and it rarely makes sense. 

For your soul the way your healing unfolds is perfect. Trust your soul. Trust the process.

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You cannot change the past and therefore the reason why you have to heal.

 

All you can do is to accept it and continue from there.

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How about drawing your own balloons and letting them fly away in your mind’s eye…

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Of course, men should do the same with their inner little boy…

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Always be proud of yourself and grateful to yourself for what you're accomplishing, especially if you think it's insignificant, because it never is insignificant!

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The hard truth about healing is that while healing you’re constantly becoming new versions of yourself and one day you will have to let go of all those previous versions of you, because you can’t go on with them.

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Healing is like being

inside a maze

there are many obstacles

you will run into dead ends

you will have to take detours

difficult tasks will present themselves to you

 

it will be painful

you will be scared

you will be desperate

 

every time you think the next turn will lead you out of the maze

it just leads you deeper inside

 

one day you will realize

your path is not supposed to lead you out of the maze

but into its very heart

once you will have reached the heart, the maze will disappear

 

for the maze is you and the healing you seek is inside you

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Healing:

the process of shedding layer for layer until you’ve become your authentic self again.

Here’s to healing and being able to deal with triggers

Today

out of the blue

she felt the pain of the past

heavy on her heart

You will always be a part of me

she said to the pain

You will always say hello from time to time

I can’t change that

But I won’t let you drag me down again

That’s what healing from you taught me

So she cried herself out

blew her nose

and moved on

To be continued...

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